A few months ago, I was at a good place after finalizing my divorce. I felt content and felt peaceful. But recently, that content feeling and peace of mind is fleeting. Right now, I feel lonely, sick, and tired. I just want to cry all the time. It seems like the divorce ghosts seem to find me even though I’m the one who wanted the divorce. Please help.
from a concerned member
Most people are often excited to take off their wedding ring after signing the divorce papers, and some might be eager to sleep diagonally on their beds. Unfortunately, the feelings don’t go. Feelings of tiredness and sadness are common.
You may have wanted the divorce, but that doesn’t mean the emotional ride of divorce won’t affect you. Emotional turmoil is inherent in any divorce process. Divorce will pull you back, drag you down, and make you miss the moments you shared while married, which didn’t look precious at the time until now.
What you have to do is experience and acknowledge what you’re feeling. The five stages of grief and loss are universal: denial & isolation– anger – bargaining – depression – acceptance. Some people get stuck in one of the stages for a long time while others try to skip some stages. If you fail to experience the emotions in these stages, you’ll suffer from the pain of divorce years later.
Safely talk and share out your feelings and experience them so that you can release these emotions. You’ll find more about this answer in our article “Why Is Divorce So Painful?“. This is part of our category of information about – Divorce Counseling!